You're Not a Failure (How to Do What You Know You Should)
If you clicked to open this, welcome to the club.
Most humans I've met struggle with this phenomenon--not doing what you know you should.
It's beyond frustrating.
There's something you know you should do, but, for whatever reason, you just don't do it.
It's not for lack of trying.
You've probably made efforts to do the things you need to do in the past--but it simply did not work out.
Why is this happening??
You're Not a Failure
Let's get something out of the way right away. You're NOT stupid. You're not. You've identified what you need to do, and that's the half the battle.
No, no. Something else is going on. Something sneaky. Most people don't go about their lives to sabotage themselves. They don't wake up in the morning and think, Hmm, you know what? I'd like to set plans and then not follow through with them!
That's not how it works. Usually it's something a little more prosaic.
You set a plan. You decided beforehand what was important to you for the day, week, or month. Maybe it was a New Year's Resolution. Whatever it was, you decided you were going to make it happen.
And then life got in the way. You didn't mean for it to happen. It just did! And then you got down on yourself, and the doubts started to creep in. Why am I not good enough? Am I stupid? I AM stupid! I always think I can change, and then I NEVER do.
Let me allow myself to jump in your brain for a second and get rid of those self-defeating thoughts.
You're Missing This One Thing
Here's my wild guess about why you're not doing what you KNOW you should do.
Ready for it?
It's because you haven't clearly mapped out the process you are going to follow.
I know, processes sound boring. Who wants to spend their free time creating processes? I do. But I'm weird. But also people who want to get things done. That's who.
Because when you've identified what you need to do, you're starting the process, but you're not actually adding the important parts of it.
You're creating a house without a roof. And that's no good if you want to protect your precious furniture from the elements.
Do This. Get More Done.
Create the process. OK, cool. But what does that mean exactly?
It means you need a repeatable set of steps that will get you to where you want to go. You won't fully know this until you've taken a bit of action. But once you take action, the process starts to unfold. It's through action that you'll see what you need to do. You'll see the outline of the steps you need to take--and then the steps will fill themselves in. They'll become clear in your mind.
Let's try an example on for size.
What if you think you'd make a really good stand-up comedian? You probably would. If you did the work to give yourself a fair chance at becoming one.
Zoom to the end.
What is your ideal image of a stand-up comedian? Can you picture it? Can you write it down? Good. You're getting somewhere. Now how do you get there?
Well, you have to go do some comedy, which means you have to get get into some clubs, which means you need to call some clubs, which means you need to do some research about some local clubs in your area.
THAT'S a repeatable process. That's something you could do over and over until it works. Big goals are just processes broken down into repeatable steps. It really can be that simple.
Now, of course, getting the work done is going to take tenacity and patience. That's just life.
But with a repeatable process, you'll be there before you know it.